Comments on: Communicating with the One You Love

By: Meta-communication: What I Said Isn’t What I Meant | Psych Central

Meta-communication: What I Said Isn’t What I Meant | Psych Central — Fri, 21 Aug 2009 17:44:00 +0000

[...] to each other instead find themselves in constant turmoil, it is not because they aren’t communicating. In fact, they are probably communicating far too much in their frantic efforts to try to get [...]

By: Sarah Jane

Sarah Jane — Thu, 22 May 2008 08:22:37 +0000

I agree with the article. I was abused before I met my partner and I’ve been open with him about it from the start, though I’ve never spoken in detail to anyone before.
I’m planning to marry this man and couldn’t imagine doing so without us knowing everything about each other, good and bad, and though it’s been very hard to talk about some things, and he’s found it very hard to hear, we understand why we behave certain ways and work together around all the issues that have come to light.
I think opening up about our pasts has brought us closer together, hearing the worst things that have both happened to us and been done by us has cemented our love and our relationship and our partnership in a way that would never have happened had I not opened up about the abuse, and the shame I felt because of it.

By: John M. Grohol, Psy.D.

John M. Grohol, Psy.D. — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 15:38:47 +0000

Joery, true, and I didn’t mean to say “have to,” so I changed it to say what I meant — you’ll likely find it beneficial in the long-term, both to yourself and your relationship.

Small secrets, like I dinged the car door, these are less likely to hurt the relationship long term. It’s really the “big” secrets I’m talking about here…

By: Hayley

Hayley — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 11:52:12 +0000

If my husband doesn’t want to tell me his deepest darkest secrets I need to respect that. It doesn’t mean he loves me any less, or that I’m no more important to him than his buddies or his sister.

“You have to find a way to overcome that discomfort and open up.” Feh! Everyone has secrets, and they never need to be revealed if one doesn’t feel the need or the ability to reveal them.

Perhaps you need to look inside of yourself to see why you need to have your loved one tell you all of his/her secrets.

By: Joery

Joery — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 05:49:49 +0000

“If you love another with all of your heart, you have to”

‘Love’ followed by ‘you have’ to is something in this kind of contaxt in its principle a wrong thing to say.

By: G

Fri, 29 Feb 2008 05:11:47 +0000

Yeah, it sounds good until you share your struggle with say pornography and then she shares it with a dozen people in her Sunday School class.