Last week there was a big-to-do about former Supreme Court justice, Sandra Day O’Conner’s husband John O’Conner, and his love affair with another woman. One of the articles I read on this topic, posted on CNN.com and titled “Son: O’Connor not jealous of husband’s new relationship”, stated that Sandra is not jealous of her husbands new relationship and in fact she is even a bit relived. What? How can a wife not be jealous of her husband’s adulterous affair? Well, her husband John O’Conner has been suffering from the effects of Alzheimer’s for quite some time and apparently his affair has helped him to deal with living in the long term care treatment facility. John O’Conner, who lives in a Phoenix facility for Alzheimer’s patients, is involved in a fellow patient, known simply as “Kay”.
Also posted on CNN.com was a video featuring Dr. Sanjay Gupta, who commented that it’s not such a rare thing for an Alzheimer’s patient to forget their spouse and fall in love with someone else. Dr. Gupta went on to say that as Alzheimer’s progresses and “ravages” more of the brain; it may modify the part of the brain responsible for people’s urges to seek intimacy. In addition he stated that it is widely hypothesized that people with dementia might “start anew” in their thinking and that a “residential care facility might become their whole world”, and that these people may completely forget their old life.
If you still aren’t convinced, check out the trailer for “Away from her”, a movie about this very issue, which Dr Gupta mentioned during his comments on the subject.
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Anavex Advances Drug Candidate For Treatment Of Alzheimer’s … by Health Tips (12/6/2007)
2 Comments to
“Alzheimer’s patients may forget they are married”
Now that was really interesting. I definitely had the impression that the Alzheimer patient lost memories and replaced them with nothing; or rather did not replace them. So they can “start anew”, huh?
Besides being fascinated, I don’t know whether to feel pleased or horrified. Pleased when I try to imagine the inner world of the patient; horrified when I imagine what it’s like to be, say, the replaced spouse.
I go and see my Dad in the Alzheimer’s ward at the local hospital every second day here in Scotland.
I don’t find the above article suprising. It is obvious to the dedicated nurses and the regular family visitors that the patient’s world collapses and emotions become detached and attached elsewhere.
Many of the patients have created an emotional bond with me because I am a regular visitor. They obviously therefore can become more emotionally attached to the other patients and nurses.
Specialists that write about Alzheimer’s appear to me to be removed from day-to-day contact with patients and nurses that they feel this is newsworthy?
That is surely of concern, and leads me to postulate that there are probably obvious improvements in care waiting to be ‘discovered’ with more ‘hands-on’ and ‘listening’ research.
My personal observation suggests that my father is observing all this from the other side of the mental abstractions that formulate our world. In other words, his consciousness remains intact and I can interact with him at that level and he clearly is relieved that someone understands his world and engages with me with enthusistic nods and approving gestures rather than treating him as an Alzheimer’s patient.
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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 30 Nov 2007
