On Virtual Friendships and Social Networking

By John M Grohol PsyD
September 25, 2007

What is all this online social networking stuff really about? Perhaps it just our modern version of portraits, of a modern narcissism that fits in with our oh-so-modern lifestyle.

That is Christine Rosen’s thesis for her essay in The New Atlantis, Virtual Friendship and the New Narcissism. She makes some interesting points:

As researchers at the Pew project have noted, the proto-social networking sites of a decade ago used metaphors of place to organize their members: people were linked through virtual cities, communities, and homepages. In 1997, GeoCities boasted thirty virtual “neighborhoods” in which “homesteaders” or “GeoCitizens” could gather—“Heartland” for family and parenting tips, “SouthBeach” for socializing, “Vienna” for classical music aficionados, “Broadway” for theater buffs, and so on. By contrast, today’s social networking sites organize themselves around metaphors of the person, with individual profiles that list hobbies and interests. As a result, one’s entrée into this world generally isn’t through a virtual neighborhood or community but through the revelation of personal information. And unlike a neighborhood, where one usually has a general knowledge of others who live in the area, social networking sites are gatherings of deracinated individuals, none of whose personal boastings and musings are necessarily trustworthy. Here, the old arbiters of community—geographic location, family, role, or occupation—have little effect on relationships.

If you like long essays, then this is one for you. At nearly 7,000 words, you should read it when you have a spare 15 minutes or so. And like many such wordy essays, it creates many strawmen and answers questions nobody has ever asked. But if you are interested in social networking and the psychology behind this phenomenon, it’s worth slogging through. The Metafilter discussion is here.

Dr. John Grohol is the CEO and founder of Psych Central. He has been writing about online behavior, mental health and psychology issues, and the intersection of technology and psychology since 1992.