World of Psychology

Be Specific When Offering Your Child Praise

By John M Grohol PsyD
September 13, 2007

Too many new parents take snippets of their own often-dysfunctional up-bringing, mix it up with some random advice from friends and family, toss in a bit of something they read or heard once, and top it off with some pop psychology and call it child-rearing.

And it works. Sort of.

The problem is that few people spend as much time reading and actually learning about parenting in the same way they learn and read about, well, pretty much anything else. Their career. Their relationships. A foreign language. Politics. Religion.

That’s why we were pleased to read this entry from Cognitive Daily entitled, What’s the best way to praise a child? Be specific. Reducing the sum of all the child research done in this area into an elongated blog entry, Dave Munger gives new parents the basics about praise — be specific in your praise (the more specific, the better). Don’t be general.

Say, “You did a good job in that coloring book” or “You did a good job helping me take out the trash” or “Great job in helping Mommy bury the remains of the cat!”

Don’t say, “You’re so smart!” or “You’re a good drawer!” or “You’re a good cook.”

Every tip helps and this one is invaluable. Click on the link to read more about the research related to these findings.


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3 Comments to
“Be Specific When Offering Your Child Praise”

Great smart tip. I’ll certainly use it with my child

Couldn’t they have picked an example besides helping bury a cat? That just struck me as odd.

i also found the ‘burying cat’ remark quite strange

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    Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 13 Sep 2007

 


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