A Dream Has Me Puzzled

By Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

I had a dream, not just an ordinary dream, but it was very very real. I’m a Christian and very active in my church. In my dream, there is a woman whom I’ve never dated although I find her attractive. I’ve never had sexual thoughts about her. In the dream I go in a room, she is in bed but under the covers, nothing showing. There were several mirrors on the wall but covered in wood, like the wood over a castle window. I don’t know how I knew they were mirrors but I did. I go over to her, lean down, kiss her on the forehead and then the dream ends. What in the world could this mean????? I’ve looked all over for an interpretation but can’t find an answer.

A: Thanks for asking about the dream. I think it’s very interesting. It would be hard to know exactly but the dream would mean without knowing more of the context, but I know that dreams are trying to tell us something that’s usually very important.

Dreams tend to offer themes and these themes are disguised in various ways so as not to arouse our anxiety.

You could probably find dozens of therapists trained in a variety of different forms –from psychoanalysis, Jungian psychology, to Gestalt and all of them would have a different version of the dream. But since you’ve asked me, I’ll tell you what I notice. That is all. Take any interpretation with a grain of salt. Find an interpretation that works for you.

The two essential points in the dream are that something is covered. The first thing you describe is the fact that this woman’s body is covered. The second is that there are mirrors, but they are covered too. So why would this be? One possibility is that the mirrors are covered so there would be no opportunity for self-reflection; the woman’s body is covered so there’d be no temptation.

The kiss on the forehead is an interesting way for the dream to end. The most important element is what the gesture rules out. This is a non-sexual gesture. Appreciation rather than a sexual awakening.

My psychoanalytic, Jungian and Gestalt colleagues will be shaking their virtual heads — but they can comment if they like.

Finally the meaning of the dream — regardless of the interpretation I’ve offered — has to do with how you felt as the dream ends. Were you complacent? Was the kiss in the forehead an acknowledgement of the relationship as it is enough? Or was this a dream that ended with anxiety and frustration? Understanding the feeling in the dream often tells us what we need to pay attention to.

Hope this was helpful.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 7 Jul 2014

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2014). A Dream Has Me Puzzled. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 21, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2014/07/07/a-dream-has-me-puzzled/