I’m Too Dependent on My Mom and Boyfriend

By Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

Hello, when I was 16 I was diagnosed with generalized Social Anxiety. I dropped out in the 8th grade because I didn’t fit in and I was so worried about people judging me. My mom is getting social security for me she cooks, for me and still buys me clothes sometimes. My boyfriend has helped us pay are rent 7 times, he buys food for me, took me to a college so I can get enrolled back in school, and so many other things. I want to get a job so I can move out with my boyfriend, but I’m too scared too. I feel as though I’m not smart enough too get a job or go back to school. I also hate being around large groups of people. I know my mom and boyfriend are getting tired of me being so dependent on them. I’ve tried counseling,but it didn’t really work. I’m on Prozac and I’m not sure if it was working cause I hardly ever go out. My therapist gave me a higher dosage,but I’m scared to take them cause I don’t want to go through the side effects. I’m at a lost here. I feel like I’m good for nothing and a waste of space.

A: People who are waste of space don’t take time to seek help. You wrote to us here because you know something needs fixing and you want to change. That desire is the essential ingredient to making positive changes in your life.

I would work with your counselor in establishing some short and long term goals. Here is a link to information about SMART goals that are used with people your age–a system that helps you plan and move toward a goal: http://collegeboundwa.edublogs.org/2012/07/16/smart_goals/

By identifying and creating your own set of goals you can reduce the dependence on others.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 5 Jul 2014

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2014). I’m Too Dependent on My Mom and Boyfriend. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 18, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2014/07/05/im-too-dependent-on-my-mom-and-boyfriend/