Secret Is Causing a Mental Problem

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

When I was a junior in high school, I went to hang out with an ex of mine because we were still friends. While hanging out with him he did something to me that I said no to several times. After that, I stopped being friends with him and never told anyone about it. My mom still talked to him though and he would come over to my house. She finally stopped, but it has caused a lot of problems mentally for me. What should I do?

A: Secrets, especially difficult secrets, have a way of growing and clouding a person’s life. You are not only carrying the memory of the event, you are also burdened by having kept it to yourself for over two years. It’s time you shared what happened with someone you trust who can give you some much-needed support. If you think she’ll be sympathetic, start with your mom. Then it would be a good idea to see a therapist to help you sort through your problems and help you feel good about yourself again. You deserve to be freed of the weight of this so you can move on.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 9 Jun 2014

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2014). Secret Is Causing a Mental Problem. Psych Central. Retrieved on September 2, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2014/06/09/secret-is-causing-a-mental-problem/