She Needs Reassurance

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

From the U.S.: My bf finds it cute when I get mad. He teases a lot but doesn’t know when it goes from fun to hurtful. He denies that he does anything wrong and says I just overreact. Recently he went out with a girl who he flirted with before we started dating and has been talking to a lot recently. He claims it is innocent but when I asked if anyone else went with them he got defensive and refused for 3 hours to tell me if anyone else was with them. then he said I was acting paranoid and psycho before finally saying a friend of theirs was there. Originally He said it was a group of mutual friends and told his family it was him and the guys.I want to work through our issues but he refuses to say he does anything wrong.

A: Why do you want to stay with someone who is so disrespectful? Your so-called boyfriend isn’t much of a friend, much less a lover. It’s more important to him to be in control and to torment you than to be in a loving, supportive relationship. Instead, he calls you names and refuses to take any responsibility for the pain he causes. You deserve better. Ditch this guy and make yourself available to someone who cherishes you.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 16 May 2014

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2014). She Needs Reassurance. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 25, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2014/05/16/she-needs-reassurance/