Do We Have a Future?

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

I’m in a relationship from last 2 months. His behavior with me is mostly sweet/humble and kind. He is very helping, caring and charming. So, the problem is he gets angry very easily on lil matters.He tells me to be more sensible to say what should be said to do what should be done(according to him).I don’t have habit of thinking so much.We discuss for hours on my faults, he makes me realise.I apologise I promise to not repeat But then how will I know what can make him angry? His getting angry makes me cry coz I never want to hurt my sweetheart but it just happens. Ex- he wanted 2 know about my past experiences and I hesitate a bit being open quickly so he got hurt,he felt I wanna lie and all, but I never thought 2 lie. In the end he had 2 support me and help me overcome hesitation. But he was just very angry before understanding he needs to support.

Now he says coz I cannot do things right way. I should do what he says so I don’t do any mistakes. I feel this will be a blunder not using my brain and not going with my thoughts for avoiding mistakes that makes him angry. Really? Then how will I stay happy? How to blindly follow? M not this way…..What 2 do? Should I think of my future with him? Or try making him understand that he isn’t correct for asking me to follow blind.

A: Please get out of this relationship. You’ve only been with him 2 months so you haven’t invested too much of your time or your love in him.

Relationships tend to continue the way they start. You’ve told me that he is controlling, suspicious and intrusive. He manipulates you with his hurt feelings and his anger. You don’t deserve this. No one does. Don’t waste your time trying to talk him out of his inappropriate behavior. If you succeed at all, it is unlikely to last.

Drop this relationship and make yourself available for someone who is going to trust you, cherish you, and respect your opinions and your privacy. This guy isn’t worth your time.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 21 Feb 2014

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2014). Do We Have a Future?. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 23, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2014/02/21/do-we-have-a-future/