I Get Emotional When Frustrated

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Sometimes I would wake up in the morning and all is good but the smallest thing would bother me and I would be very grumpy during work. I don’t feel like talking to anyone when this happens. I am normally really talkative and like to joke around. When I get mad I just want to go to my room and sleep.

I’m only 22 but I am the only one paying for rent and all the expenses in my family. It seems to happen right before my period. I also get very emotional for example when I get frustrated I want to just want sleep and when I get even more mad I cry in the restroom.

I really do try to be positive but sometimes I just can’t. I try to be thankful for my job and everything but sometimes I can’t and when people ask me are you mad me? It really bothers me (especially when I’m just trying to be quiet so I won’t lash out).

There are a lot of times where my brother and my mom would be so kind to me but I just ignore them or reply in short comments. I feel really bad when I do that. I really don’t want to be this way but I just do and end up with regrets because I know I will not have them forever so I want to be nice to them while they are here….

A: Many women feel more vulnerable and emotional just before their period. That’s an absolutely normal response to the hormonal shifts going on in our bodies.

I think there is more to it than that, though. You are carrying a heavy load. At only 22, you are supporting three people. To your credit, you are doing it without complaining and you are making every effort to be positive. But it sounds to me like the stress is getting to you. Usually you can handle it. But when you are premenstrual, your defenses crumble a bit and you have more difficulty coping.

There are at least a couple of ways to deal with this. Internally, you can remind yourself that these episodes always pass. You can let yourself have a good cry and sleep it off. Externally, you can make more of an effort to reduce your load. You didn’t mention why you are the only one paying rent. Maybe it’s time for a family meeting to work on the financial problems together. If your mom is disabled, can she apply for disability benefits? Can she find some work? Is your brother old enough to be more helpful — if not with money, with more help around the house? I applaud your efforts to help your family in hard times. but it’s also important that everyone in the family does their part — both for your mental health and to keep the relationships in the family healthy.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 9 Nov 2013

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2013). I Get Emotional When Frustrated. Psych Central. Retrieved on September 24, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2013/11/09/i-get-emotional-when-frustrated/