Mad and Sad

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

I’ve been so angry lately and so sad I don’t know why I’m fine when I’m alone but when someone talks to me or I’m with someone ad they do something I don’t like I get in a bad mood and I’m always so rude to my mom I don’t know why I need help but I want to know help for what I just need something to make me happy again I don’t know what it’s not that I don’t want to live sometimes I feel that way but not lots anymore

A: Your emotions are on the loose partly because you are 16. Honestly. Most adults wouldn’t be 16 again for almost anything! It’s a time that can be very exciting but also confusing and even frightening. There is so much to figure out about yourself, your classmates and friends and the world. It can be really overwhelming! If that weren’t enough, often the body is doing its own thing — adjusting to new hormones and new growth. It’s often hard to keep a perspective and focus on all the good things that are happening when you feel like your nerves are just too close to the surface and everything seems like a very big deal.

There are two things you can do to make the next few years way better. First, take care of yourself. That means get enough sleep, eat right, get away from electronic screens and do something active at least part of most days.

Second: Get out of yourself. You already know that thinking about yourself isn’t getting you anywhere. Trust me. Doing things with and for other people will. Join some kind of club or sport at school, one you can get yourself to care about. Take on a service project. Make music. Get into a theatre group. People who share a goal and work toward it often become friends. Do something nice for your mother – even if you don’t feel like it at the time. She’ll be pleased. You’ll like yourself better.

I wish there were a way to magically get you to 20 but there isn’t. It wouldn’t even be smart. You need these next few years of growing to become your adult self. Follow those suggestions and you’ll make it through just fine – just like most people do.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 13 Sep 2013

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2013). Mad and Sad. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 28, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2013/09/13/mad-and-sad/