I Resent My Sister

By Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

So, growing up with my sister I made many sacrifices and took care of her , our parents were physically and emotionally unavailable , so I took it upon myself to protect her and that was no easy task ; given she had major behavioral problems and ADHD . As we developed into adults I never was able to stop being more like a parent . I continued to take care of her , even financially . I was always there for her no matter what . The stress of having poor parents , a sister who took advantage of me and dating a man who treated me badly made me so depressed . The depression changed me and instead a sister who helped me when I needed help , I got a sister who turned on me and starred horrible rumors about me . I’m so sad about it . I just want to move on . But I’m so sad . Please help me move on.

A: I am so sorry you had so many challenges growing up. Your instinct to want to move on is a good one. But it sounds like it is time for a change at many levels. I would strongly encourage you to begin individual therapy or group therapy to develop a support network that will help you make this transition. It sounds like it is time for you to devote your financial, emotional and psychological resources to your own development. In order to do this, creating a support network will be helpful. Group therapy is often a very good way to do this. The find help tab at the top of the page will give you names of therapists in your area.

Change doesn’t happen overnight, however, so see this as a time for transitioning into a new way of being. I would work with your therapist to develop both short- and long-range goals that help you get more of what you want and leave behind those things and people that have not worked well for you.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

Photo

 

 

Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 11 Aug 2013

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2013). I Resent My Sister. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 31, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2013/08/11/i-resent-my-sister/