My speech is deteriorating; I often muddle words up and end up going ‘blarlarlararlar’ then continue – others have noticed.
Also, my in writing, I often miss out letters and punctuation – even when writing my own name.
I have a voice in my head, constantly talking to me. Mostly we get along, but sometimes it can be very harsh to me, like the other day when me and my boyfriend were arguing I ended up having a panic attack because of the things it was saying, which I don’t remember very well now.
My memory has also gotten worse, it wasn’t brilliant to begin with, but you’d think I’d be able to fully remember the first kiss I had with my boyfriend and to return a book to the library and do homework. My memory is something I am rather worried about.
Personally, I’d also say I’m a bit delusional too. I often think that people are reading my mind, and are judging me for my thoughts so try not to think at all when in public.
I’ve also become rather emotionally detached, like I can’t really properly feel emotions anymore; I never got stressed with my exams, and I didn’t get excited when going to a concert for my favourite band. Also, I tend not to feel bad at the misfortune of my friends unless it involves me; like the other day, one of my closest friends had a panic attack and I couldn’t comfort her properly because I didn’t feel anything. I only really feel stronger emotions in strong situations.
I also find it very hard to actually do important things, like study. I always find something else to do, and I tell myself to do it, but I physically can’t because I can’t be bothered.
A. You described having memory and concentration problems. Those problems are associated with depression and other mental health disorders and also with conditions like insomnia or other sleeping disorders.
You also mentioned having speech problems. How often do the speech problems occur? When did these symptoms begin? There are many other questions that need to be answered.
Hearing voices is an unusual symptom. It may be indicative of a mental health disorder but it’s important to determine the context in which this symptom is occurring. We all have an inner voice and it’s difficult to determine if this is what you’re experiencing or if it’s something more serious.
You also think that you have delusions. It sounds like you are experiencing paranoia more than delusions but more information is necessary to make that determination.
Without being able to conduct an in-depth examination, and in the absence of a comprehensive assessment of your symptoms and psychosocial history, it’s difficult to determine what might be wrong.
Your family has a history of mental illness. It increases the likelihood that you may also develop a mental illness but only slightly.
My recommendation is to speak to your parents about receiving a mental health evaluation. Report your symptoms to the evaluator. Consider bringing this letter to your appointment because it documents what you have been experiencing. It would also be advantageous to be evaluated by a medical doctor to rule out a physical cause that may be contributing to your symptoms. After being evaluated by in-person professionals, you will have a better idea about what may be wrong and can be treated accordingly. Please take care.
Dr. Kristina Randle
Mental Health and Criminal Justice Blog
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 9 Jul 2013
Randle, K. (2013). Worried That I May Have Schizophrenia. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 10, 2013, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2013/07/09/worried-that-i-may-have-schizophrenia/