Worried about Parents’ Reaction to Boyfriend

By Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

I’m 18 and I don’t know what to do 2-3 weeks ago I invited my boyfriend over to my house when nobody was here, I just wanted to hang out with him not like I wanted to do anything else. My stepdad unexpectedly came home and found him in my room he kicked him out and I was really scared he thought we had sex when we didn’t! I insisted for him to not tell my mom since she’s sick and tired how she’s going to react he hasn’t told her but he wants to talk to his parents since he thinks I’m going to bring him again since its summer and I’m home alone all day. I’m going crazy I’m really stressing over this a lot of things are going through my mind I don’t want his parents to think bad about me like my stepdad did and hate me. I don’t want to break up with my boyfriend my mom really likes him and if she finds out she going to dislike him.

A: Thank you for asking this important question. The main feature here is to be willing to negotiate with your stepdad about your expectations and his. I would highly recommend you sit down and talk about what your needs are concerning with your boyfriend — and what your commitment to your stepdad is with regard to having your boyfriend over. It seems like both of you have to review each other’s expectations.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 1 Jul 2013

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2013). Worried about Parents’ Reaction to Boyfriend. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 24, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2013/07/01/going-crazy/