Jealousy, Insecurity Cause Breakup

By Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

My boyfriend broke up with me because I pushed him too much about “bad feelings” towards his 30-year-old good female friend. He made friends with her and if it wasn’t for her according to him we wouldn’t have gotten back together. How come I feel or felt that way? He is so good to me does everything right! I just didn’t think it was normal for a 30 year old with her son to be so extremely close e reassured me there is nothing and he wouldn’t hurt me that way and yesterday I couldn’t bare the feeling of going to her house. The fact she asked him about dating others made me real uneasy. He broke up with me because he can’t take it anymore.

A: Your jealousy sounds both understandable and problematic. I think two things make sense. If he is still broken up with you, give yourself the opportunity to talk your jealousy over with a therapist. It is hard to tell from your description where or if the line was crossed on your side (the jealousy)—or his side (with the relationship). If the two of you have gotten back together, see a couples counselor. These issues often reemerge if their causes are not understood.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 8 Mar 2013

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2013). Jealousy, Insecurity Cause Breakup. Psych Central. Retrieved on September 20, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2013/03/08/jealousy-insecurity-cause-breakup/