I need advice a about something, I am from a business family and my parents had introduced me to another family and their son for marriage, and had ALMOST fixed it, I couldn’t stand the guy, and he was nothing I need in my would-be world…my gut feeling said I will never be happy with him,I was sad from the very moment, crushed from inside and knew that I was making a mistake, also he tried to flirt with me in cheapest/vulgar way possible every chance he got and that was it for me, so I told my father and things were called off in a few days. I did not think back then , but now I think I might have overreacted since I saw the opportunity to get out the mess and the fact that I did not like him….Now I feel a little awkward that , was it pre destined to end or was he the chosen one or did my free will end it, is it possible I will find someone…what should I do as I feel guilty about hurting my parents who have been actively seeking a groom for me and have failed so far?
A: In countries like yours where arranged marriages are typical, families are often trying to make unions. These often work and can be successful, but they are obviously not fool-proof. Your father made a wise decision because he did not want his daughter to be unhappy in her life. This is a good thing, yes? Every fiber of your being said it wasn’t right – does that sound like he was the chosen one? Hardly. This is a time to thank your parents for honoring you and your needs. Success is based on failure. You are simply in the process of moving toward success.
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 23 Dec 2012
Tomasulo, D. (2012). Broken Engagement. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 26, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2012/12/23/broken-engagement/