My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost four years. We have a really great relationship. However, over the last few months, I’ve been suffering from anxiety. I feel like something is wrong with our relationship and I am having a really hard time trusting my boyfriend. My boyfriend dated his ex for two years before we dated. She cheated on him and I don’t think he ever got over it. I had never dated anyone before him. He has never cheated  on me and up to this point we have been looking for engagement rings. it all started with an article I read online about men cheating. I was feeling insecure and I looked at my boyfriends phone. he still had his ex-girlfriends contact info. I asked him to delete it and anything else relating to her, but a few weeks later, I saw that he still had some old pictures and emails from her on his computer. I feel like he’s keeping all these things for a reason. I just can’t get over it. I feel heart broken. He says he forgot he had all this stuff. How do I trust him? Is it me?

 

A: Thanks for your email. This may be more of your own personal issue than an issue of trust with your boyfriend. Do you have a history of rejection or abandonment in your past? From what you’ve shared, you have a solid relationship. Watch the video for my complete response.

Take good care of yourself!
Julie Hanks, LCSW

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 28 Aug 2012

APA Reference
Hanks, J. (2012). [Video] I Really Want To Trust My Boyfriend. Psych Central. Retrieved on September 22, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2012/08/28/video-i-really-want-to-trust-my-boyfriend/