Feeling Trapped

By Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW

My baby is 7 weeks old and I love spending time with her. The only thing is I can’t leave the house with her without my partner because if she cries people just stare at me and it makes me feel uncomfortable. I can’t even go around my friend or families homes without my partner in case she cries and I’m afraid people will judge me. I have been feeling like this for a while and it just makes me feel trapped that I have to stay in the house. My friend has recently had a baby and has offered to go to the clinic and get my daughter weighed but I can’t even do that. What do I do?

A. Babies cry. That’s what they do. You seem to be interpreting the way people look at you as being negative. That may be an inaccurate interpretation. Perhaps you are feeling inadequate about some aspect of your caregiving ability but if so, it doesn’t mean this is how others perceive you. The only way to know what people think of you is to survey them. Short of that, it is simply a guess.

People likely will have opinions about you, which may be inaccurate, but it shouldn’t concern you. Ideally, one should be immune to the opinions of others. Of course, everyone wants to be liked but we can’t control what others think about us. The opinions of those whom you respect should be the only opinions that matter.

I would recommend seeing a therapist in this situation. A therapist could discuss what fears you have about your baby crying. He or she could assist you in eliminating those fears and refocusing your time and energy on meeting the needs of your baby. I wish you well. Please take care.

Dr. Kristina Randle

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 25 Aug 2012

APA Reference
Randle, K. (2012). Feeling Trapped. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 20, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2012/08/25/feeling-trapped/

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