Someone is Trying to Control Me
Okay so I have this guy in my head who is putting thoughts in my head, thoughts about self injuring again and all over my body, it gets worse every night.He has been there off and on for almost two years, but this time I don’t think that he will be going away. He was only there when I was having trouble at school with bullies or fears that it would happen again, but i am on summer break right now and he is back. Sometimes I can actually feel him in my head, like there’s a lot of pressure in my head.
Some nights it gets so bad that he makes me walk towards the knives in the kitchen but i walk away and i just end up pacing back and forth trying to keep control. I can’t yell back because when I do I start shaking really bad as he starts trying to take control to show me not to mess with him.
My diagnosis so far is depression and social phobia but I think there is something else wrong with me. I have a appointment with my psychiatrist in a week and two days for a med change.
Now there is more people after me, again, they are a secret government that controls everything. They left me alone for a while but now they are back and I have to wear a scarf to hide my face. Sometimes i feel like others can read my mind so I have to think of something else when I am putting in passwords or listen to music to confuse them.
I just don’t know what to do or what will even help anymore. I mean i try listening to music, watching videos, drawing, spending time with family but nothing seems to help because nothing can really hold my attention anymore.
A; The first thing to do is to see a medical doctor for a complete medical workup. Sometimes delusions like these are caused by things like a vitamin deficiency, an electrolyte imbalance or a brain tumor, to name only a few possibilities. I’d hate to have you go on heavy-duty psych meds if the problem is physical.
If you are medically okay, then you need to take your letter and this response with you when you see your psychiatrist. A psychiatrist relies on you to provide enough information to determine an accurate diagnosis and to work out a treatment plan. Unless you are completely honest about what you are experiencing, your psychiatrist is left to guess – not a good basis for prescribing medicine.
If you do have a mental illness, I strongly suggest that you get started with some psychotherapy as well as medication. You need more relief than meds alone will give you. A therapist can provide you with important support and can help you learn additional ways to cope.
I wish you well.
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2012). Someone is Trying to Control Me. Psych Central. Retrieved on August 3, 2015, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2012/07/26/someone-is-trying-to-control-me/