Obsessed with Harmful Behaviors

By Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW

I have a good life, job, home, family yet I think everyday about wishing i were dead. I have cut in the past which I know I am too old to do, I have the scars on my arms but still think about it constantly. Options seem to be drink, over eat, cut or die.

Logically I know I have a good life, I am so confused over my thoughts. I wish I could just understand why I can not be happy with all the good in my life. Do you have ideas why I can’t can’t get these ideas out of my mind? Days are only get to bed, to get though the day to get to bed. I hope this makes sense to you. Thank you.

A. You believe that you should be happy but you’re not. Sometimes the things that “should” make us happy don’t have that effect. Money is a great example. People often believe it is the key to happiness but many wealthy people are very unhappy.

Something is driving you to engage in self-destructive behavior. There are many reasons why people self-injure but some of the most common are: emotional release; lacking basic problem-solving skills needed to handle life problems; thinking that they deserve to suffer; punishment for a perceived wrongdoing; or to interrupt emotional numbness. Self-injurious behavior and suicidal thoughts signify that a person is suffering and that help is needed.

There is a reason for your feelings. I don’t have enough information to determine what that is. I would recommend counseling. What may not be evident to you may be evident to a therapist who is trained to deal with emotional problems. He or she can assist you in better understanding your behavior and can teach you the skills necessary to improve your life. Click the find help tab (see top of page) to locate a therapist in your community. Please write again if you have additional questions.

Dr. Kristina Randle

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 4 May 2012

APA Reference
Randle, K. (2012). Obsessed with Harmful Behaviors. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 22, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2012/05/04/obsessed-with-harmful-behaviors/