Dad is Constantly Lying

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Well my mother has recently passed away and my dad is constantly lying. He always says we will do something fun or he will help me but it is never true. He also drinks sometimes. What should I do?

A: I’m so sorry for the loss of your mom. I’m sure this is a very difficult time. It sounds to me like your dad is grieving. He intends to do what he says he’ll do but can’t get up the emotional energy to do it. He may be drinking to ease his own pain. Unfortunately, people who are grieving are often not at their best. In your dad’s case, he may not always remember that you are grieving too. From your point of view, you have already lost your mom and now you feel like your dad is leaving you too. That’s really, really hard. Meanwhile, you are distracting yourself by being angry with him instead of dealing with your feelings about your mom.

I suggest you talk to your dad about finding a therapist to help both of you come to terms with life without your mother. You can click on the “Find Help” tab on the homepage or you can ask your doctor or school counselor for some names. There may also be a free grief support group through your local hospital.

I wish you both well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 20 Mar 2012

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2012). Dad is Constantly Lying. Psych Central. Retrieved on July 22, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2012/03/20/dad-is-constantly-lying/