Im medicated for auditory hallucinations but I have troubling thoughts about committing murder and continuing to drugs. I was diagnosed with severe depression and possible schizophrenia (my doctors aren’t sure). I was prescribed Citalopram (30 mg) for the depression and Abilify (1 mg) for my auditory hallucinations that frequently told me to harm or kill people.
Even though I haven’t heard any voices recently, I’ve been having this empty feeling, boughts of paranoia and frequent murderous thoughts. I alsmost feel like im being told to kill just like with the voices. I frequently use Marijuana and LSD….and I’m using these drugs to help make this go away.
This is starting to bother and scare me, and I really want to know what’s going on. What’s wrong with me?
A. There are several concerning aspects about your situation. The main concern is that you are having “murderous thoughts.” It is a sign that your symptoms are not well controlled.
My second major concern is your frequent use of marijuana and LSD. Both are hallucinogenic drugs. The drugs may be preventing your psychiatric drugs from working properly. In addition, the marijuana and LSD, in all likelihood, are exacerbating your symptoms. Self-medicating with illegal drugs is always a bad idea. It is dangerous and it can lead to disastrous outcomes.
I would strongly encourage you to immediately speak with your prescribing physician about your uncontrolled symptoms. I would also suggest going to the hospital if you feel that you cannot control your behavior or if your thoughts become overwhelming.
In addition, make your prescribing physician aware of your frequent use of marijuana and LSD. Many people might not want to reveal that type of information to their doctor; however, it is important that he or she is made aware of all relevant information. I hope that you are able to get the help that you desire. Please take care.
Randle, K. (2011). Murderous Thoughts. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 22, 2015, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2011/12/22/murderous-thoughts-3/