Am I Clinically Depressed?

By Kristina Randle, Ph.D., LCSW

I’m always depressed when I’m not around my ex. because he’s the only one who really gets me and knows me and really listens when I talk. When he isn’t around I have no one to talk to so I start thinking that everyone(my ex, my son, everyone) is better off without me. I never leave my bed or my house very much(online schooling). I wake up all night and I never wanna get up in the mornings. I hate the thought of people not wanting me around. I cry all the time! I hate myself a lot/most of the time. The only time I leave my house is family events or my ex convinces me to go somewhere with him. I’m always in pain unless I’m venting to my ex. I mean emotional and physical. I just ache all over. I want to get better and need to for my son and ex(we might get back together later on and he’s my rock and I’m his and if I’m sick I can’t be there for him like I’d like). My ex is the only one that I know who knows about me thinking I’m sick because I don’t want to go to the doctors and have them put me on meds or something. Am I clinically depressed? Should I ask my mom to take me to the doctor to get help or am I fine? I need to know!!

A. An in-person interview, with a trained diagnostician, would provide the most accurate diagnosis but depression may be a realistic possibility. According to your letter, your symptoms include: a desire to isolate, physical and emotional pain, low self-esteem, and the consistent urge to cry. Those are common signs of depression.

Your symptoms are interfering with your life and they should be treated. To answer your question directly, yes, you should ask your mother to take you to a doctor. Being evaluated by a doctor does not mean that you will have to take medication. Many people who are receiving treatment for depression don’t take medication. Instead, they undergo counseling. With the right therapist, counseling is an effective treatment modality.

What are your next steps? Speak to your mother. Tell her about your symptoms. Ask her if she will schedule an appointment for you with either a primary care physician (PCP) or a local therapist. Consider seeing your PCP first to rule out possible medical problems. The PCP can then refer you to a therapist. If you choose not to see a PCP, the “find help” tab, at the top of this page, can help you to locate a therapist in your community.

The best way to find the right therapist is to call at least four or five and ask them various questions, including:

  • Can they help you?
  • How exactly would they help you?
  • What would they suggest that you do?
  • Would they be willing to see you and if so, how soon and how often?
  • How long have they been in practice?
  • Have they helped other individuals with similar problems?
  • What were the outcomes of those situations?

Choose the therapist who you feel most comfortable with and schedule an appointment. I wish you the best. Please take care.

Dr. Kristina Randle

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 27 Aug 2011

APA Reference
Randle, K. (2011). Am I Clinically Depressed?. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 27, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2011/08/27/am-i-clinically-depressed/