For years I’ve been wanting to be locked up

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

i’m sorry for taking some of your time but i remember asking my mom a question a couple of years ago when i was going though a sad depressive phase (i’m 16) and almost killed my granma because she told me i was washing the dishes the wrong way- i didn’t though- i ended up cutting my thumb… anyway i told her that i needed to be locked away.
is that normal, i mean even with some of my issuses with wanting to kill others and myself, dreams of being a killer,constant nerviousness, inablity to stay focused, making an imaginary friend, numbness,ups and downs, etc.
i’m going to therapy but still i keep getting the nagging feeling that thats not going to help me and one day i’m going to snap.
i still want to be safe and not hurt others but i have constant impulses. is it normal for a kid to want to be locked up?
thank you for taking the time to read this- even if you dont answer.

A: It sounds to me like you may be trying to protect yourself and the people you love with this idea. Perhaps you don’t trust that you will always be able to contain the violence that you feel within you. Feeling like you’re going to snap and do something that would deserve a lockup is the part that isn’t normal.

I really, really hope you are sharing what you are thinking about and feeling with your therapist. He or she can’t help you find other ways to manage your impulses unless you do. You sound like a guy whose intentions are good but who is having a terrible time. Please let your therapist help you.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 25 Aug 2010

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2010). For years I’ve been wanting to be locked up. Psych Central. Retrieved on September 21, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2010/08/25/for-years-ive-been-wanting-to-be-locked-up/