Obsessive thoughts of infidelity

By Daniel J. Tomasulo, PhD, TEP, MFA, MAPP

I am a female who have obsessive thoughts about fictional and real life women who have had numerous affairs. The women are married and promiscuous. I am afraid of watching tv shows and movies and reading books that may or may not have adulterous wives. I am afraid of dealing with new thoughts. I even try to do research online as to why wives cheat and how many men the wife cheats on her husband with.

A: “Never waste jealousy on a real man: it is the imaginary man that supplants us all in the long run.” – — George Bernard Shaw

My guess is that since you noted your age as mid-30s and single that you are concerned about whether you can make a commitment. Since you are so concerned about women who cheat on their husbands you may be worried that you might make a commitment to a man only to find yourself drawn to others and tempted with infidelity.

If this sounds right to you I would look for a therapy group for singles in your area to explore your concerns. If this somehow seems off make an appointment with a therapist (here is a referral list) to discuss your concerns.

By dealing with your fears directly it is likely these thoughts will diminish.

Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 30 Jul 2010

APA Reference
Tomasulo, D. (2010). Obsessive thoughts of infidelity. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 23, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2010/07/30/obsessive-thoughts-of-infidelity/