Unhappy to be employed again

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker


i now have a job after 3 months of being unemployed. i should be happy, right? But I’m not. In fact, i’m mad. I’m so mad I’ve been crying for hours.

A few days ago, I talked to someone and she mentioned me not having a job, and said something like, “don’t you think there’s something else to do besides sitting around all day surfing the net”. And i was really bothered by it. So 2 days ago, I asked my mom’s friend if she could help me find a job, then, today she found a vacant position that’s way out in line of my profession, it’s just temporary because she said there’s a job that would open that suits my profession (just not sure when), so I took it. And I also started today.

I was thinking, and been depressed about it, because I thought I was just too desperate to have a job that i’d grab anything that would be offered to me. Now I’m not really sure if I want this. And i couldn’t just stop because she might not consider me again when that ‘position that suits my profession’ opens.
I don’t know what to do anymore

A: It sounds to me like maybe you have your self-esteem too tied up in what job you have. You want to be in your own profession and your new job reminds you that you haven’t been able to find one. That’s a blow to anyone’s ego. As you know, these are hard times for lots of people. It’s important not to take the current job market personally.

But here’s something to think about: Any career counselor will tell you that it’s better to have a job, even a job that’s unrelated, than to be unemployed when you’re looking for a job. Doing a job, and doing it well, shows a prospective employer that you are serious about being a worker, that you can be counted on to be responsible about attendance, that you know how to be a team player, that you have a positive attitude, that you have the initiative to keep developing yourself, etc. You can’t do any of these things while sitting alone in your room surfing the Web.

Your current job does not have to be seen as a step backward. You have been given the chance to be within an organization and to prove yourself. Do an excellent job at whatever it is and quietly let key people know that you want to pursue your own profession as soon as you can. Use this time to network within the organization and to take advantage of any in-service opportunities that are available. Above all, make yourself valuable to the team in any way you can.

You have been given an opportunity. It’s up to you to use it.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 28 Jan 2010

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2010). Unhappy to be employed again. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 20, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2010/01/28/unhappy-to-be-employed-again/

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