How do we get him to a doctor?

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker
January 10, 2009

My girlfriends father needs to see a therapist. He definitely has depression, and chronic pain, maybe manic depressive, and maybe bi-polar. Whenever anyone suggests that he talks to someone he always has an excuse why its all “b.s.” and that won’t help him. How can we convince him that it may help him??

A: The simple answer is that no one can make another person get help they don’t want or think they need. Pushing him will only make him dig in his heels. What your girlfriend can do is tell her father how much she loves him and how hard it is for her to watch him be in such pain. She can ask him as a favor to her to go with her to see a psychiatrist just to hear the doctor out. She can suggest to him that all he has to lose is an hour of his time. And she can tell him how much better she would feel if he would just humor her and give it a chance. If your girlfriend uses this softer approach and focuses the conversation on her love for him and her need to make sure he is all right, he just might be willing to at least go for a consultation.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie