Drawn to the wrong people

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Q: I have been dating a woman for 3 years. She is very cold. I don’t know, really much about her emotionally, as she will never open up to me. She refuses to make a commitment to me, as in marriage. I started seeing a gal that is 20 years younger than I , and she is becoming very important to me. I can’t give her a 100% because I am still waiting around for my girlfriend to commit. We have viritually no sex life and she is frequently traveling and doing things with her daughters and Father, whom also greatly dislike me. What should I do?

A: As difficult as this may seem, the answer to your question lies in yourself. Why would you stay for three years in a relationship where you feel so lonely? And why is the alternative a woman who is of another generation? At over 60, I’d think you’d want to find someone who can love you and cherish you and who can understand what it means to have come of age in the 60’s, not the 80’s. Please consider seeing a therapist to help you figure out why you are depriving yourself of the love and companionship you long for.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

Photo

 

 

Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 3 Sep 2008

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2008). Drawn to the wrong people. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 28, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2008/09/03/drawn-to-the-wrong-people/