He likes me, he likes me not, he likes me

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Q: From a U.S. teen: Ok, so there’s this guy that i really like and we dated for about three months. Then he wanted to break up with me, but didn’t want to tell me, so he tried getting one of my friends to do it for him, but she wouldn’t so he decided that he was just going to ignore me until i got the hint. she told me why he was ignoring me so i broke it off. But i still really liked him. Then him and my best friend hooked up. I still liked him then too. He’s a senior this year and will be leaving. It’s starting to scare me because then he’ll really be out of my life, once i see him walk out the door night of graduation, it’ll be the last. Anyways i talked to him today for the first time in awhile, he usually doesn’t talk to me alot just short talk. But we actually had a conversation and i asked him if he wanted to hang out with me and some friends because we’re like going camping this thursday and he said that he had something going on that day and then he asked me about friday but then he remembered he had something planned for that day too. But at least he talked to me and tried to re-plan it and stuff. . . so could that possibly be a sign that he may be into me again?

A: He doesn’t like conflict so doesn’t tell you a straight no. You can’t let go. It’s not a good combination. My guess is that he feels crowded and you end up feeling rejected. Since you’re both in the same high school, graduation doesn’t make things as final as you imagine. You’ve let him know you’re interested. If he decides he made a mistake in breaking up, all he has to do is pick up the phone.

But I wouldn’t wait around for him. Go about your business and be open to new relationships. You deserve to have a boyfriend who thinks he’s lucky to have you and who will be with you 100%. You don’t need a relationship with someone who is so ambivalent.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 6 Jun 2008

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2008). He likes me, he likes me not, he likes me. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 24, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2008/06/06/he-likes-me-he-likes-me-not-he-likes-me/