My 15 year old daughter is very uncomfortable if left alone. She has not been left alone alot so I guess she is not used to it, but I find it surprising at how nervous and uncomfortable she becomes when she is to be alone for even relatively short periods of time, ie half an hour to 45 mins. Her 10 year old brother doesn’t have the same problem.
A: Have you tried asking her in a loving, gentle way what’s the matter? It certainly isn’t usual for a 15 year old to be this nervous about being alone. I have to wonder if something is frightening her and she doesn’t feel she can talk to you about it directly. Instead, she is telling you through her behavior.
If she says a believable no, then it may be a matter of getting her used to being on her own. Talk with her about what she needs to feel safe and how to gradually get her more and more comfortable with being her own company. Since she is 15, it’s very important that you do what you can to treat her as a respected member of a team instead of as a misbehaving child. Part of helping her act more grown-up is to treat her as the maturing person she is.
I wish you well.
Dr. Marie
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