From a nurse: My husband and I have been married for 7 years, with a 3 yr old and 5 yr old. My husband is a health nut. I find him very sexy. I love having sex with him. He has been telling me that I make him feel insecure and unwanted. I want to have sex but I always fall asleep in the middle of foreplay. I want to save my marriage but he says he has given up and doesn’t care anymore. He said my promises and apologies do not mean anything to him anymore. Please help me to fix this and save my relationship.
A: Why is it that people in the medical profession are always the last to go see a doctor? Your problems may be caused by an undiagnosed and untreated sleep disorder. Before you and your husband decide that you secretly dislike your husband or sex, please see your doctor. It may well be that you are chronically exhausted due to lack of quality sleep. That plus running around with two small children all day may be wiping you out. Then you get all cozy and relaxed during foreplay and, zonk, you’re out.
I don’t blame your guy for being hurt but before he takes your behavior personally, he needs to support you in making appointments with your doctor and a sleep specialist to get some information. This has gone on far too long.
I wish you well.
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 25 Jul 2007
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2007). Help! I Fall Asleep During Foreplay. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 10, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2007/07/25/help-i-fall-asleep-during-foreplay/