Should she marry a guy she cheats on?

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

I ve been with my boyfriend for one year, but I ve cheated on him twice. Probably because I like blonde guys and hes not blonde. But he is very loyal, funny, intelligent, atractive, kind, talkative, intuitive, etc. He is what I ve always looked for in a guy, even tough I like other guys more than him (physically speaking) We are planning to get married on november but Im afraid I ll cheat on him again with other guy. I dont want to. I dont know if I should get married even tough I like other guys. I guess Im also afraid of commitments cause Im 32 and never been married. Im really afraid, confussed. My friends tell me that I should feel excited to get married but Im terrified, and dont feel excited. The idea of a wedding and that has never been a dream to me. I would like to have kids, form a family with him, but the process of marrying him stress me a lot (invitations, flowers etc)
I dont like that he snores, that he sweats like a wrestler, but I have a great time with him, I think no one has ever made me happier. But love to look at other guys
Please help!

A: If you love this man, please don’t marry him. You’ve already cheated on hiim and you are telling yourself that you are going to do it again. You aren’t attracted to him. You don’t like things about him that he can’t change. It’s not fair to him to promise to love and cherish him for the rest of your lives when you know you won’t. It’s not fair to yourself to marry someone you are not really in love with. It sounds to me like you’ve got a great friendship. Keep it that way.
I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 2 May 2007

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2007). Should she marry a guy she cheats on?. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 21, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2007/05/02/should-she-marry-a-guy-she-cheats-on/