When will my parents STOP!

By Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Q: My parents have a problem with Drugs and Alcohol. They have had this problem for some years now. My father is able to hold a job , but when he gets paid he blows his money on the wrong things; he has a mind to do right, but it seems he just cant do it. My mother has a problem with leaving and not coming back for days and sometimes weeks. She says she leaves because my father does not do her right. She has no job and depends soley on my father, but he does not give her money b/c he thinks she will blow it and run off and leave. She comes in for a few days and goes right back out. It seems like they are not concerned with there lives. Me and my grandmother tell them they need to get help, but they don’t listen. My mother allways says no one will get her help, but when we try she say’s shes allright. This situation is really stressing me out, especially when my mother runs the streets b/c we don’t know if she is okay when shes out there. I know they have to make up in their mind they want to stop and get help, but it seems like its never gonna happen and the time might be to late. I dont want to lose my parents, so what can i do to get then help? Please gide me on what to do.

A: I’m so sorry you have so much to worry about. And I’m very glad you have a grandmother to talk to. No kid should have to deal with this kind of situation. I’m glad that at least you aren’t in it alone. Your parents are so involved in a fight with each other that they can’t see that they are destroying themselves and their family. It seems that you and your grandmother have already tried to talk to them without success. It’s time for the two of you to get more support and practical help for yourselves. My best suggestion is for you to contact Alanon. Go to www.al-anon.alateen.org to find a meeting. If meetings are too far away, there is also an Al-Anon/Alateen Hotline you can call: 1-800-344-2666.
I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 14 Jan 2007

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2007). When will my parents STOP!. Psych Central. Retrieved on September 19, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2007/01/14/when-will-my-parents-stop/