Pregnant or not?

By Holly Counts, Psy.D.

Q: I only have one ovary, and I’m on the depo shot. Me and my long-term boyfriend have been having sex for almost 2 1/2 months, and we haven’t used a condom in a while. I’m terrified that I’m pregnant because my parents are hard-core Catholics, and sex is a sin. I can’t go to a doctor because I‘m only 16, and I don’t want my mom to know unless I know for sure, and I have no money to get a pregnancy test. My sister knows that I’m sexually active, yet I don’t want her to know that I’m not using a condom. I know that it was a bad choice to not use a condom but I don’t know what else to do. I can’t get an abortion, because to me that’s just horrible and I don’t know if I could give my baby up for adoption. Yet I don’t know if I could really keep it because I have so many goals in life. I don’t know what to do…

A: There is a possibility that by the time you read this you may know whether or not you are pregnant. If you don’t know yet you need to find out. In some states you can go to your doctor about this without parental consent at first so you may be able to where you live . You could also find the local Planned Parenthood agency and they can help you with all the issues you have mentioned. Most counties and cities have free health clinics that could help you as well. Bottom line is that you need to find out and you need to get help if you are pregnant. If you are not ready to talk to your parents, I think it would be a good idea to go ahead and talk to your sister. You need some support and if you are pregnant she may be able to help you tell your parents.

If you are not pregnant I hope that you use this as a learning experience. People who are not prepared for the possible consequences are not ready to be having sex, and as you have discovered the shot or the pill is not enough. You should use condoms no matter what. They are your only protection against sexually transmitted diseases. If you are pregnant, I wish you the best of luck. I’m sure when push comes to shove, your family will be there for you. Take care.



Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 9 Nov 2006

APA Reference
Counts, H. (2006). Pregnant or not?. Psych Central. Retrieved on February 28, 2015, from

Want a more immediate answer from others like you?
Use your Psych Central account in our self-help support community.

Subscribe to Our Weekly Newsletter

Find a Therapist
Enter ZIP or postal code

Users Online: 13644
Join Us Now!