A. So earlier this year I was with a guy. We liked each other a lot, and right as I thought I was in love, I found out he had been hooking up with his ex-girlfriend, who didn’t know he was with me either. All three of us got into a huge argument and we both forgave him eventually… but now he’s going out with his ex-girlfriend again. His girlfriend is in Israel right now for another month though, and now he’s calling me to hang out a lot again. Last night he came over and watched a movie with me and we were cuddling the whole time. I know it’s wrong to his girlfriend, but I still can’t get over him. What should I do!
-18 and confused
A: Once, shame on him. Twice, shame on you. He’s already shown you he is a player – twice. If he really wanted to be with you, he would cleanly break it off with the other girl and then ask you out. Letting yourself slip into involvement with him, knowing that his gf thinks he is being true to her, is setting yourself up for heart ache.
Furthermore, you are violating an important “girl rule”. It’s just not honorable to sneak around with another girl’s boyfriend. You wouldn’t want someone to do it to you. So don’t do it to another girl. Anyway, although he may be charming, this guy doesn’t deserve either of you.
I wish you well.
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 13 Aug 2006
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2006). Two Timing Guy. Psych Central. Retrieved on January 26, 2015, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2006/08/13/two-timing-guy/