Confidential to California Mom:
This is a complicated situation and it would be irresponsible of me to try to assess what is going on with such limited information. That being said, it is very possible that your son is struggling with issues of sexuality. If so, of course it is a highly emotionally charged issue to try to talk about. I suggest you go to www.pflag.org and see if the information there is helpful to you.
Confidential to Albuquerque wife:
As always, I can’t possibly give you a definitive answer about who is right on the basis of a letter. It’s always possible that your husband is right that you are crazy. It’s also possible that he is making you feel crazy when you are in fact the victim of domestic violence. I looked up agencies in your city that might be helpful. I suggest you call the following place to see if they can connect you with a counselor who can help you sort things out. If you can’t do it for yourself, do it for your kids who are undoubtedly being effected by the situation.
Business #: 505-884-1241
PO Box 27519, Albuquerque, NM 87125
Fax #: 505-768-2449
D V Legal Resources Hotline: 505-243-4300
Statewide #: 1-877-974-3400
Confidential to “Shattered”:
Of far more concern to me than the cross dressing is his distorted body image, excessive dieting, and cutting to relieve his pain. These strategies and the cross-dressing may give him temporary relief but they don’t get to the root of the problem. I strongly urge you to be sympathetic and supportive. He needs an experienced counselor to help him address his pain directly. You need a counselor to sort out how you really feel about the situation.
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 7 Jun 2006
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2006). Confidential messages from Dr. Marie. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 11, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2006/06/07/confidential-messages-from-dr-marie-2/