Q. I’ve suffered with major depression and suicidal thoughts for much of my life. During my life, I have tried to do the right things to help myself become a happier person. I don’t do drugs, drink, or smoke. I do my best to stay fit and exercise but often times, these things do nothing to help me feel better. Lately Ive been having extreme bouts of anger. I become reactionary and impulsive. I sought out counseling believing it was my last resort. I have been seen a therapist for about 3 months now and all she has managed to do is bring out more anger in me. Some of my anger is toward her because I feel as though she is not taking my case seriously. She has lied to me and admitted to lying to me about something. When I told her that her lie hurt and angered me, she apologized but has since been less friendly. She almost seems mean now. She seems and though she’s angry with ME for being angry with HER and confronting her about it. Im not sure if i should continue my sessions with her or not. I don’t feel like starting over with a new therapist but I also don’t ‘like’ this person anymore. I don’t have confidence that she knows how to deal with anger issues. I also don’t know how I can trust anybody when I can’t even trust my therapist. What should I do : ( ? She was my last hope.

A. It would be interesting to know what exactly you were mad at your therapist for and subsequently, the reason she stated she was mad at you and if she didn’t, to know what you “think” she was mad at you about. It may be a matter of miscommunication, simply a big misunderstanding. Without knowing more specific information about this situation, I can really only give you general advice. It will be really difficult to make progress in therapy if you do not like or trust your therapist. I know you do not want to start over but if you are not making any progress with your therapist now and you have lost confidence in her, changing therapists may be the only way to get the help you want to deal with your anger issues and suicidal feelings. You may be able to move past this if you share your true feelings with your therapist about how you feel about the situation. You may be able to talk this all through to the point where you are satisfied with her and you can go on. If you do not feel you can talk things through with her or be completely honest and things continue to be rough, you might have to change therapists—you would have no other choice. There are not many options. Try talking with her and be honest about how you feel, and if you are not satisfied, consider changing therapists. Good luck.

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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 5 Jun 2006