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Did he lose interest?

by Kristina Randle, LCSW
July 7, 2005

My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years. Lately, we have been going out with his single friends and he has been talking to other girls using the excuse that he is trying to hook his male friend up with the girls. The other day we went out and he disappeared with his male friend and when I found him, he was dancing with another girl and chatting away (flirting). I became really angry and we got into a big fight. I told him that he had been disrespecting me and that I had enough. He said that I was overeacting and that it was just dancing. But to me it wasn’t and it really bothers me so much. I am up to the point that when I look at him, I feel like I don’t know him at all. Everytime I think that i can trust him completely he does something like this.

A. Its good that you do not trust too easily. On the other hand, it is bad to trust too easily. The most important thing is to trust appropriately. You should trust someone no more or no less than he or she deserves to be trusted. They must prove to you their trustworthiness. And every time, they prove untrustworthy, you should recognize that it is unsafe to trust them to that degree. It’s a slow process of building trust and learning to trust but the main point is that you must trust as much as he deserves to be trusted, no more or no less.

 

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Last reviewed:
  On July 7, 2005
  By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.



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